August 14, 2007

Life in Azerbaijan makes me smile. I dare you make it through the list!!!

I’ve been told that Americans smile too much.  I try not to smile, but I’m cursed with remembering all the funny things while I’m walking by myself.  This results in a stupidly goofy grin plastering itself on my sweaty mug.  For the benefit of those in the U S of A these are a few (many) things in the AZ that make me smile.  No particular order (this list has been building since I first landed here, so it’s quite long, and dated and new all at once)

 D–nk and climbing to the roof of the hotel then sitting on the very edge, seeing the moon and the Caspian from 18 stories.

Waking up to a text from Siolo!!!!!

Air conditioning in the hotel room

That my mad ninja skills still worked, d–nk and in heels for climbing ladders, (don’t try this at home, seriously!)

Embarrassing text sent to Matty

Actually, make that all the drunk text I sent, (come on you know you loved ‘em)

Eating McDonald’s muffin and drinking McDonald’s coffee in Baku. Tasted REALLY REALLY amazing.

A stiff long island ice tea.

Quite good techno and dancing like mad for hours!  (Katie, you and Dan would have LOVED the music)

Reviewing pictures from the weekend and finding myself in photos that I don’t even remember being taken.

Seeing 2 unlikely dancers get down

Being asked by a Scottish bloke if we were with a tour group. 10 Americans, with cameras, we stick out. At least none of us were sporting Hawaiian shirts *shudder*

My host sister cut red roses from the garden, and placed a vase of them on my desk. (I have never received red roses before)

Language lessons on the Caspian at dusk.

Sneaking a drag off Mattys cig, tasting so great because it’s on the sly.

Wild Marshurka rides

Pot holes the size of kiddy swimming pools

Flirting via text message

WTF!? Moments (as Tom says it’s what our life consists of)

Tom giving me a Kashi Granola Bar!!!!!!!!!!!!  (Tasted beyond delicious!!!)

First care package from home (Never have I been so stupidly happy over receiving Hand Sanitizer and Wet Wipes)

Receiving my Electric Blue Pumas in care package

Noticing while walking to school that my Pumas match my iPod Shuffle

Mussing up Jill and Sally’s names all the time.

Cutting Nate’s hair with medical scissors, in the dark, with no mirror

Nate’s pimp ring (it even has tape and an eagle)

Getting a whiff of “Sewerfresh” and suddenly very, very homesick for Butt Grove Vahilla Drain and RCP

Russian Whores!!  (Every time we do something)

Culturally appropriate…yeah…

Mikey’s text message about knickers

Buying skank shirts with Katie!!!!!!  (And then chickening out at the last min and NOT wearing them…sorry bois, gotta wait until New Years to see us decked out)

The entire retail world of Baku knowing that I am ‘boyuk’ (bloody hell, there seems to be no way that I can just slip under the radar)

Uc’ the dog, greeting me at the school entrance.

Being semi attacked by a mentally challenged man (with one top tooth front and center, I was fixated by the tooth, it wasn’t gold, but surprisingly clean)

Jill telling me:  “You don’t seem like the type for PDA’s”

Ryan’s hair cut.

Matty’s stories

The Dove Statue

Reading about the underground cities in Turkey

Princess the Pet Chicken of Urcur

Underoos’  (as said by Erin)

Every time FL says “Lets get Crrrrunk!”

“You won’t believe what just happened!”   (From Nate, and it’s always the start of a good story)

“Look at my life!”  (A, when he whines about having to do housework.)

Walking along the beach at dusk.

the small things like, bright flowers in drab streets. (Goychey)

An Art Nouveau staircase on the outside of a Baku building

Finding my pictures that I thought I had lost.

Shadows from the grapevine in my yard.

Atmosphere on my iPod Shuffel

Sally telling me I was Ghetto

Almost getting run over by young kids driving little cars around the base of the Dove.

Teaching the Azri guys USA slang.

Gold Grills (the bruthers of da hood aint got nothin on the blinging Grills here)

People with all their teeth

Making Charlie laugh

I like Tomatoes’ (the first Azri phrase I learned, and seemingly the only one that stuck in my brain)

Flashing Gang Signs from the West Side in most snap shots

‘I got a hard on for classics’ (yours truly)

“Get on any bus. No fuck” (FL in response to my text stating that I had once again missed my bus)

Making my host mother laugh when I mess up another Azri phrase

“I ❤ U ” texts from Katie. P

Spending hours talking with Jill-dear about everything and nothing.

Basically, anytime I get to hang with Kate, Jill, and Sally.  Can I ask for better gulrs?

The kids in our conversation club thinking Nate and I were related.

Shopping with Katie in Baku.

Running into Jody outside Alimali!!!

Being BFF’s with Jody

Texting Hanna plumbing related questions on behalf of the J girls.

Actually being able to communicate a few thoughts in Azri.

Tripping EVERYWHERE.  I’m a walking hazard, its embarrassing, but provides amusement to everyone.

Having a good rush

My host mom calls me her “Fourth Beautiful daughter”

A group of guys ‘Purrring’ like cats at Jill and I when we brought water at a market.

Spending dusk on the Caspian Beach.

Finding out my site and cheering with my PC Mates!!!!

Mr. Matt knowing more about the MN Twins than I do.

Tom’s hair cut.

Tom losing his pants.

Tommy being the only person I know who can look dang fine at 5 am in only boxers and dress shoes.

Showers at Kelli’s

Seeing Blades of Glory and laughing really hard and all of a sudden missing Rousey.

Going to a Toy (wedding) with Matt

Having a video camera shoved up our faces while we danced for over 200 people at the Toy

“So, when are you guys gonna get married”  – the brides brother to Matt and I

“You look like Tom Cruise, can I get a picture with you?’  – a 17 yr.old girl in the conversation club to Matt

Cotton Ball and Stove Demonstration from Nate’s dad at 12 midnight.

Talking with Nate about things no one else would understand.

“Problem var!”

A pink, flowery, glittery, oversized birthday card from my parents.

Dancing with joy at Nate’s Birthday

“I Can Be Your Hero” as Uzeyar’s mobile ring

Singing ‘I Can Be Your Hero’ with Kelli

A post card from Alyssa.

Eating Mcdonalds French fries and actually enjoying them…then puking because they were so dreadfully nasty.

Raphiel stopping the discussion by looking me dead in the eye and saying “It’s been a while since I’ve seen you. Where have you been?’ in response to my question about AZ’s ecological future. (perhaps something was lost in translation?)

Having black feet after sitting on the beach.

Being sick and using a stupidly needy amount of Konturs to text Matt about everything.

Katie Snow calling me and finally able to hear about her STELLAR wedding.

Missing the above Katie soooo bad and needing to have a good girl talk.

Charlie getting stuck in the ‘OUT’ door of the Alimail


5 Responses to “smiles”

  1. Mr. X said

    I took you up on the dare and won. So there.

  2. Mike said

    Well, dang! It’s good to know there are one or two things in this wild and crazy world that can put a smile on your face.

    Have you taken up C-Walkin’ to accompany the gang signs and other aspects of yo’ thug life yet, or are you reppin’ the Slobs in Azerbaijan? 🙂

    Keep on keepin’ it real, homegirl. And watch your step. 😀

  3. Brian said

    That’s a helluva list. I didn’t know people thought Americans smiled too much? Or that there was such a thing as too much smiling?

    Word, yo. Word. Block lockdown.

  4. Kate said

    That’s an awesome list!!! (when I read my name there I was like “who is Katie Snow?” for a second! lol But you do seem to know a lot of Katie’s by the way)

    It’s funny that you ate at McDonalds… sounds like you’ve had lots of memorable moments thus far.

  5. ds said

    mmm a nice list, siolo would approve.

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