warning: emo

August 14, 2007

The Baku Trip.


We, I, survived.  Despite my tendency for mishaps, complete klutziness and hankering for streaking when drunk, I made it home with out major incident.  This is both a good and bad thing.  Good, because, really, I’m not here to have drunken wild antics and act like another directionless USA girl.  I have agreed to act in a certain way, and back in the states I haven’t had drunken wild antics since…uhh, a long time ago.  Cleaning up has been a long process and one I hope I stay with.  Besides, there is no reason to risk my work and reputation here for one night of blowing off steam.  Bad, because, I haven’t had an opportunity to blow off steam and let loose.  And I don’t really have an exciting story to brag about involving midgets, bribes, and the Russian Mafia   Back in the states, I’d go climb a crane, run through the Lab, or drop into the Waterfall Drain (all while pretending to take pictures he he :-).  Sometimes, doing something completely stupid is exactly what I need to get me back on the right track, I learn the hard way.  I know this about myself, which is why I was on top of the Hotel at 4am sitting on the edge, dangling my feet off.  Perfectly happy to be pushing boundaries, while justifying in my head that I was not being dangerous. I had no light; there were no lights up there.  I thought about girl that died in MN near my apartment and the ensuing panic, when before full information was released, people were scared it was me that had fallen to her death. The only light she had was her mobile.  I wanted to do something thrilling, and decided that the familiar territory of a rooftop was a way to get my fix for heights, not risk being sent home and toe the line of exciting.  If I hadn’t been on the roof top (which to me was safe) lord knows what I would have been doing. In a drunken, ruckus causing brawl with other hot headed Irish lads/lassies?  God forbid streaking?  Attempting to open city manholes? And nothing happened, I spent a long time just looking, trying to see the Bay and the Cityscape in the moonlight.  It felt like I was back in MPLS, on top if the Carlyle, thinking everything and feeling almost nothing.


3 Responses to “warning: emo”

  1. siologen said

    It sounds like your homesick, but… not quite. I was never homesick for Oz, only for the places id been to while travelling, after id been to them. Give yerself at least 4 months before you start popping manholes, thats how long i gave myself in Manchester. Gives ya time to get the lifter perfected and size the bastards up.


  2. Kate said

    That was rather poetic and a bit sad. *hug*

  3. mcmacdonald said

    heh. we have a factory and a ship on the hit list. i shall impress and it seems i may have dragged another person into sharing my crazy need for abandoned places.

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